General Surgery Movie

I made this little clip to chronicle every single day on the general surgery service. Enjoy!

Last Day

Thursday was my last day on the general surgery service. I never thought this would happen to me but I was so happy that I burst into song in one of the hallways when no one was looking. I don't remember exactly what I was singing but it had the phrase, "Today is a beautiful day" in it. It was one of those moments you see in musicals where the lead character starts spinning around and singing. I half expected people to start joining in the chorus with me but, unfortunately, no one did. It was quite enjoyable really. So for the rest of the day any time I was on an elevator by myself I would repeat my musical performance. I think I may have a future outside of medicine.

Stupid

Today I found out I was stupid. Today the "Star Wars" attending led me into the ICU for a pimping onslaught.

Dr. Attending: What class of drug is imipenem?
Medical Student: A macrolide, no, wait, that's not right
Dr. Attending: That was stupid. Well, what's the mechanism?
Medical Student: (blank stare)
Dr. Attending: Are you special or something?

Good times.

The Infamous Whipple

For the surgeon the Whipple Procedure consists of the following: Cholecysectomy, Pancreaticoduodenectomy, Truncal Vagotomy, Antrectomy, Choledocojejunostomy, Pancreaticojejunostomy and a Gastrojejunostomy. For the medical student the Whipple Procedure consists of standing in a hot gown, gloves and mask for 9 hours while being grilled on whatever random anatomy fact may cross the surgeons mind, while holding a retractor or two.

Here are things that I learned after being scrubbed in on this procedure: 1. Take an ibuprofen before starting. 2. Do not ask questions. 3. Even if you are right, don't expect to be acknowledged whatsoever.


Now, point number 1 is self explanatory, but let me explain point two and three.  It may seem odd that a medical student shouldn't ask questions, but it is absolutely imperative. If a medical student does slip up and ask the surgeon a question, this is the conversation that will follow:

Medical Student: Dr. Attending, I'm not sure I'm oriented here, is that the external oblique we just transected?
Dr. Attending: Good question! Is it?
Medical Student: Well, I'm not sure, that's why I was asking.
Dr. Attending: You should know that.
Medical Student: Yes, you are right. I will study more. (Note to self: Do not ask Dr. Attending anything)

So the lesson again is: NO questions. Let the attending be in charge of questions.


Point number three can also be explained in this simple, real life conversation:

Dr. Attending: Okay, so is the Superior Mesenteric Vein anterior or posterior to the pancreas?
Medical Student: (feeling confident) It is posterior.
Dr. Attending: Are you sure?
Medical Student: Uh, yes.
Dr. Attending: Really?
Medical Student: Well, I was... Why? Is that incorrect?
Dr. Attending: (Silence)

So, as you can see, there is really no way to win. That is why I came home and ate a large bag of french fries and watched 24 all night.