Monday, July 25, 2011

So I'm a Resident Now

I have just completed one month of residency and this is the main thing so far that I have found that is different from being a medical student...

As a medical student I usually felt somewhat justified when I didn't know something. I mean, after all, I'm only a student! I'm still learning! Now, I just feel like an idiot almost 24 hours per day. I mean, I second guess almost every little thing I do. I'm not even comfortable giving someone tylenol. I nearly poop myself any time a nurse wants me to make a decision about a patient. But that's okay. All part of growing up. Besides, at least the hospital has to do my scrub laundry.

Now, completely off topic is my patient-resident conversation of the day, or I guess of the year judging by how well I have been keeping up...

Patient high on Benzos while I'm irrigating a giant laceration on her arm: (jumping off the table)What the @$#%!
Me: Oh, sorry, did that hurt?
Patient: No! Don't you realize that my dress isn't squirt proof?!?
Me: Uh, what?
Patient: Shut up! I'm trying to sleep!
Me: Yes mam.

That's right people. Another life saved.

Monday, March 14, 2011


That's all I have to say! Goodbye Medical School!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

What is pimping again?

Well, it has been about 3 months now since any attending has asked me a serious question about medicine. Does that mean I have forgotten everything? Yeah. Mostly it does. My thoughts as of late mostly center around when my next meal is and what I have to do in order to escape medical school.


Attending: Okay you two. Name the most common areas for an aneurysm in the brain?
Me: (looking at ceiling, thinking about lunch)
Other student: blah blah blah (gets it right)
Attending: Good! Now what are the most common brain tumors in adults?
Me: (still thinking about lunch, also wondering why he has never tried nacho cheese in a burrito. I know! Sounds awesome right???)
Other student: blah blah blah (gets it right again)
Attending: Great! (looks at me) She is so much better than you.

Shortly after this my phone was confiscated by this attending because I was checking my email.  I has gots to get out! Luckily this eval wont be on the MSPE...

Also, Nacho Cheese, as it turns out, is not that good on a burrito.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Okay fine, I will update you all

Here we go.

What to say about 4th year?

Magical? Yes.

Enchanting? Yes.

Expensive? Holy freaking crap yes.

I must say that I had no idea that I could spend the massive amounts of money that I have been spending on interviewing this year. Looking at my credit card statement is much like looking at Mt. Everest and contemplating a climb. Both give you this sense of utter hopelessness. Ah well. That's what loans are for right? After all, we all know this is fake money.

Interesting interview dialogue of the month:

Medical Student: Hello Dr. Attending, it is a pleasure to be interviewing at your institution
Interviewer (in slow, dramatic voice): Why. The. F*CK. would you want to come to this place?
Medical Student: I, uh, thought that, uh...
Interviewer: Ah that's okay. Did I mention that my greatest hobby is carving meat?

I have a good feeling about this place.