PA: Medical Student, go assess these patients.
Medical Student: Okay.
Medical Student: Patient number one has a cough that comes in paroxysms with post-tussive emesis. He has had the cough for 6 weeks. I think we should cover for pertussis.
PA: Um, no. It's just viral.
Medical Student: (what the @#%$@!!)
Medical Student: Patient number two is a well child check. Everything was fine but there is a 2/6 systolic murmur at the apex. I think it should probably be checked out.
PA: (listens at the 2nd and 4th ICS) Nope. No murmur.
Patient's Mom: I think he's right, we have been told he has a murmur and that he should have a "heart ultrasound."
PA: (listens at the apex) I found a murmur here.
Medical Student: (glares at back of PAs head)
Medical Student: Patient number three has perfect circular patch of hair loss with a boggy mass on his scalp. It's classic for a fungal infection. I think we should treat him with an oral anti-fungal.
PA: Nope. This is a lipoma or maybe a sebaceous cyst.
Medical Student: I really don't think...
PA: We need to cut it out.
Medical Student: Should we try an anti-fungal first?
PA: Nope. We need to cut it out. (makes an incision on patient's head) Weird, there is nothing in here. Oh well, stitch this up.
What a day.
well THAT'S annoying. Hope things get better...
ReplyDeletei am also on a rotation with a PA who pisses me off. good luck
ReplyDeleteScary this guy is practicing medicine...
ReplyDeleteJust found your blog and read the whole thing. I'm on surg now and have felt like crap all week, so this made me feel so much better. You really can't win, no matter how much studying you do.
ReplyDeleteYou had me going until the last line.
ReplyDeletePlease post more!!
ReplyDelete